January 17/01/2023

A lady of extraordinary level of patience, a lady of amazing courage and sacrifice, who is remembered in the history because of her of strength of Imaan, her love and obedience of Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), her obedience to Deen, she was a wife who elevated her husband and children by sacrificing her own rights and emotions, whose footsteps were heard by Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) in Jannah, she was a lady of outstanding excellence, an extraordinary example of mother and tarbiyyah of children. She was Sayyidatina Hadrat Umme Sulaim (Radiyallahu Anha).

Umme Sulaim’s (R.D) name was Rumaisa bint MIlhan, popularly known as Umme Sulaim (R.D). She was embraced Islam in the early days of Madinah. Umme Sulaim (R.D) first married to Malik bin Nadhr, with him she got a son who became the great Sahabi Anas bin Malik (R.D) later. She embraced Islam In Madinah without the knowledge of her husband initially, When the husband came to know of her reversion to Islam, he got very annoyed and angry. Every single day he used to abuse her and torture her verbally so that she renounces Islam, but she was a lady of amazing patience. She instead of thinking even to renounce Islam she gave Dawah to her family. She tolerated everything patiently whatever her husband was barking about, rather than focusing on that, she focused on her son Anas with her nice motherly love and compassion to influence him towards Islam, she used to give the little son Dawah and tell him the beauty of believing in one Allah, who is the Lord of the land and sea, lord of the sky and the world, who created everything out of nothing. The little Anas was amazed by the nice explanation of his mother, therefore, the light of Imaan enlightened his heart, the mothers effort became successful one day, he also embraced Islam. The husband kept behaving more violently day by day, then one day, when he understood that she was very strong in her conviction of Imaan and will never give up her faith no matter whatever he does, he then gave up and went away from Madinah to Syriya for forever, leaving behind his wife and son. Never even thought what might happen to his wife and the boy. She started living as a single mother with her little son without having any fault of her own, but those hard days the Imaan of both the mother and son increased in manifold which had seen later in her life. She was a devoted wife and mother but when it came to the obedience to Allah and Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), she was strong enough to accept any hardship that she has to bear. In those hard days one day suddenly the news of the husbands death came to Madinah, more sad moments and more heartaches…….. but still she remained patient. After the death of her husband, she devoted herself to the proper upbringing of her son. She took her son Anas (R.D) to the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) and expressed her desire to give him for the Khidmah of the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam),

She knew that her son will be blessed with the Duaa and company of the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) and will learn the heavenly knowledge from him too. She gave her little son for the Khidmah of the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), when we think deeply we understand it was not so easy for the mother to whom he was the only company after embracing Islam. but the Tarbiyyah of her child was first to her so she sacrificed her own emotion and gave the child to the best of all teachers, the prophet of Allah (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam). Here we can learn how to give Tarbiyyah to a son. learn this lesson from her that a mother is the first Madrasa for a child, we will teach them whatever good knowledge we have of Deen, the good manners, steadfastness in hardships and remain patient, the reward of patience, tell him about the Qudrah of Allah to build the love of Allah in his tender heart, teach him the Sunnah of Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) as much as we know, and after that when they grow up and need more education of Deen, we should give them to a teacher who is blessed with knowledge, wisdom, sunnah, piety, Ikhlas and Amaal, strong in Imaan, brave and courageous to take the responsibility of Deen. The way Umme Sulaim (R.d) kept her beloved son to the best of all mankind to give him right Tarbiyyah. For next 10 years Anas (R.D) was with the prophet (S.W) and did Khidmah 24/7 to the Rasul of Allah (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) at home and in journey, until he completely colored with the color of Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) and became Anas bin Malik (R.D) the narrator of so many Ahadeeth. A mothers scarifies has great value for to have great people of time, a mothers sacrifice makes such amazing people who introduce the world with great nations. Allah SWT kept example for us in the lives of Sahaba-Sahabiyyah ikram (R.D). May Allah gives us Taufique to learn from the beautiful lives of Sahaba Ikram (R.D). Ameen.

In her days of widow-hood, one day one rich person of Madina, Abu Talha came to her and gave the proposal of marriage. He was not a Muslim yet, she refused to marry an unbeliever instantly, Abu Talha was well informed about her steadfastness, loyalty, honesty, high linage, good character and all other good qualities a person searches for, to chose a bride. Abu Talha again asked to her to think about the proposal. This intelligent lady created then such an excellent example of Imaan for the mankind that the people until Qiyamah will marveled by learning this story. She said to Abu Talha, ” I can get married with you, but you have to accept Islam at first, if you accept Islam, your acceptance of Islam will be my Mahr (Compulsory Dawry a Muslim women owe to her husband as a marriage gift, Although the Sunnah is Fatima Mahr but a lady can increase the amount, Islam gave her permission of that but better we follow Sunnah as Allah SWT kept Khair in following the Sunnah ) for merrige”

Allahu Akber! In this world the brides family keep increasing the marriage Mahr of their girls, here this amazing lady forgiving her own right (Mahr) to make a non believer to a believer Subhanallah! Abu Talha then accepted her proposal and became a Muslim (R.D). Umme Sulaim (R.D) called her son Anas (R.D) to act as her guardian and give her merry with Abu Talha (R.D), the marriage took place. She then asked for the Duaa of the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) made Duaa for her and her family. After few months of their marriage Allah SWT blessed them with a son named Umair. The baby would remain sick most of the time, the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) would sometime go to their place and play with the child. In one Hadeeth we find the boy had a bird named “Nugair”, he used to love the bird so much, once the bird flew away and he was sitting in one place with sadness, Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) used to make everybody feel comfortable with him, he could even mix with a small child like a child, He was passing that path and have seen him sitting in a sad mood, then he asked with riming words to charm him and make him happy, ” O Umair, where is Nugair?” the child then answered that the bird flew away. How beautiful was the Akhlaq of our prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam)!

However, this child was the the son of Umme Sulaim (R.D), the boy used to remain sick mostly, she used to look after her little beloved child. One day the boy became very sick, Abu Talha (R.D) was very worried for the child as a father always do, he took Suhur to fast that day the he went to a distant place for some work. The little child died in his absence, Umme Sulaim (R.D) was in front of the child, aha… we understand how hard was that moment for a mother! the mothers love for their children has no comparison in this world, and usually for the child who remain sick and weak, the parents always keep a special love and attention for that child, the mother who was looking after the child, it was very hard for her but she created another great and huge example of patience at that moment which is almost un-conceivable for us, so what did she do? She knew her husband was fasting and he went for work and will come back with weak and exhausted body after long day of work and fasting. So she told all her family members not to share this news to her husband when he comes back, she herself will share this news to him. She then gave bath to her little baby, shrouded him and kept the dead body in an another room, then she prepared good food for her husband so that he can eat to break his fast in the evening, She dressed her up with nice clothing before the husband came back which she always used to do. How beautiful example to learn from our Sahabiyyah ikram (R.D) subhanallah! when the husband came back, the worried father asked about the son at first, she answered ” he is in peace now”. Abu Talha (R.D) felt solace by the answer then she gave him food the she fulfilled other family responsibilities to please the husband at night, Subhanallah! how amazing life Sahaba (R.D ) had! Today we do so many things to have equal rights, and as a result of that the ladies become like men and the men become like ladies. But Allah SWT gave us beautiful examples to follow until Qiyamah which ensures ultimate success in this world and in the Akhirah and make everybody to understand what actually their rights are. Everything could be done later, she could weep and cry like all other ladies, but the Sahaba (R.D) utilized every single opportunity to get the Duaa and Barakah in their lives. She knew Allah SWT kept Barakah in her patience, in her Sabr, in her Khidmah that she done to her husband at that night even after having such huge heart ache AllahuAkber! such an amazing lady.

The night passed, in the morning she asked to her husband ” I have a question to ask you”

Abu Talha (R.D) replied, ” What is that?”

She asked ” suppose somebody gave something to a person As Amaanah, when the person asks that person to give it back, should he give it back?”

Abu Talha (R.D) answered , ” He must give it back, he has no right to hold it back”.

She then answered, ” Our Umair was given to us as Amanah of Allah, Allah SWT took him back. arrange the burial for him”

The fatherly heart at once filled with grief and sorrow and he said to her, why did she kept him in darkness and had together at night, He left home out of sorrow and went to the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), he narrated the whole story to the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), Who was well informed about Umme Sulaim (R.D) and her desire to get full Barakah in her life, and her Fikr to have righteous children. The prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) made Duaa for her with the word,

“May allah bless your night.”

Within few day she conceived, she and her family was helping and giving company to Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) during her pregnancy period, at the end of her pregnancy once Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) was going to a journey, She and Abu Talha (R.D) also accompanied to Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), after the journey when Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) returning to Madinah. It was the practice of Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), he would not enter Madinah by night after returning from any journey, while they were near Madinah suddenly Umme Sulaim (R.D) started feeling labor pain, the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) went ahead, Abu Talha (R.D) asked to Allah ” Ya Allah you know how much I’m desirous to go out with the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) and return with the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) but my situation kept me back.” Umme Sulaim (R.D) heard this Duaa somehow, she instantly called him and said, ” I’m no longer feeling any pain, lets proceed”. They then kept proceeding while she was in labor pain but she did not let her husband know about that, Subhanallah! how great sacrifice to elevate a husband to more spiritual height! May Allah gives us at least an iota of these qualities. Ameen. They kept proceeding towards Madinah, then finally they reached in Madinah and at the same time she gave birth to a beautiful boy. She then said to Anas (R.D)

” let anybody not to suckle anything to the baby before we take him to Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam)”

A mothers Fikr to get her baby Tahnik (A Sunnah Amal to take the infant after the birth, to a pious man, who will chew some dates or other sweets then put it in mouth of the infant ) by the Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) and get the Barakah of that Tahnik in the life of the child Subhanallah! Next morning they took the baby to Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) and Abu Talha (R.D) took some dates with him too. When they reached to the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam), He asked ” is there anything with him?” Abu Talha (R.D) replied “yes, some dates”. The prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) then took a date and chewed it, then put it in the mouth of the baby then he blessed the baby with the name, ” Abdullah”.

Just one scarifies of that night after the death of her child Umair, she blessed with such Duaa of the prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) that , Allah blessed her with another son, blessed the baby with the Tahnik of Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) and when this baby grown up, this Abdullah was blessed with 9 sons and all of them were Hafidh of Al-Quraan. Because of her patience and fikr of the Tarbiyyah of her children, Allah SWT blessed her with such an outstanding progeny Subhanallah! May Allah gives us Taufiqe to learn from the beautiful life of Sahaba (R.D).

Not only in her family life she was an amazing and courageous lady in the battle field too! She was among those ladies who used to participate in the battle to serve water for the Mujahideen, and for the nursing of the wounded Mujahideen. In the Battle of Uhud she tended the wounded fighters of the battle. Hadrat Anas (R.D) narrated that ” I saw Ummul Mu’mineen Aa’ishah (R.D) and Umme Sulaim (R.D) running to and fro in the battle field and carrying water for the wounded”.

Umme Syulaim (R.D) attended in most of the battles, She attended in the battle of Hunain During her pregnancy, she kept a dagger on her person, The prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) asked her, ” What is this dagger for, O Umme Sulaim?” she then answered, ” If any Kafir comes near to me, I will tear open his abdomen with this” Such courage to a pregnant lady! Allahu Akber! She was a lady who was not only Intelligent in family and upbringing children but was an amazing worrier of Islam, had proper knowledge of self defense too Subhanallah!

And that’s why once prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) said “When I entered the Paradise, I heard someone’s footsteps – It was explained to me that she was Rhumiysa bint Milhan (Umme Sulaim (R.D).”

She was very keen to learn Ilm of Deen too, sometimes she would ask such questions to Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi wa sallam) which other people would might feel shy to ask but her desire to learn and practice Ilm in every single steps of life was so marvelous that made the entire Ummah to blessed with the knowledge of sensitive matters subhanallah! how blessed lady was she! how beautiful and pure was her heart! may Allah gives her huge reward on behalf of the entire Ummah for taking part in protecting the Deen of Allah and command of Allah (Deeni knowledge) . Ameen.

Our Sahabiyyah (R.D) showed us such beautiful and amazing path to follow! may Allah accepts us to follow at least one of the quality of Umme Sulaim (R.D) and bless our lives with the Hikamah and wisdom of Deen too. Ameen. May we also can scarifies our own desires to prepare our family and children to take the responsibilities of Deen. Ameen.

Dandenong Madrasa